Thinking Back
by Tifa-Shan
Summary: A short fic. Tifa and Cloud think about the old days, as Tifa also wants to tell him about her feelings. Rated PG for mild swearing. Please R/R ^^


Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy VII or it's characters.  
  
^^; This is just a a short fic I wanted to write. It's after Cloud finds himself, but before the final fight. (Also before the Highwind scene the night before the battle.) Basically, Cloud and Tifa are thinking back on the old days, and Tifa wants to tell Cloud her feelings from then to now. Please R/R.  
  
~* Thinking Back *~  
  
Tifa Lockheart lay awake in her bed, her mind restless with thoughts. Her body itself was tired, and welcomed the bed and the warmth it's blankets supplied. She laid on her stomach, it bare against the bed as she still wore her tight white cotton tank top, and that black skirt. Her armor and accessories lay piled beside the bed, needless to say. Arms that were used as weapons were shoved under her pillow, as her head rested over it.  
  
The day had been yet another in their long journey, Tifa fighting beside Cloud. But now, she just buried her face in her pillow, thinking about other thoughts.  
  
Thoughts of home came to her as she raised her head to look around her dark room. She blinked her eyes, which slowly adjusted to the lack of light. 'To think I'd end up here...' She thought, moving her head to look over to the next bed beside her, though she couldn't actually see it. Light breathing sounds were heard, as she listened keenly to every noise. Yuffie was asleep in the next bed, and outside some crickets chirped. 'All those years ago..' She paused, as her arms pushed her upper portion of her body up from the bed. 'sleeping in my room in Nibelheim....I never thought I'd be living such a life.'  
  
She yawned a bit, then turned her body over tiredly, pushing and kicking the covers off from over her. The cold air of the room touched her rather exposed body, as she pulled herself up to sit in the middle of the bed. Her small hands raised up to rub her closed eyes, blurry and itchy from the loss of sleep. Afterwards, she blinked then looked around the room once more, before finally standing up out of her bed, pulling her mini skirt down from being scrunched up and rolled under. Her bare feet touching the cold wooden floor sent a shock, then a chill through her body, causing her to shiver.  
  
'Uhnn...why am I getting up again?' She tried to figure, wondering if she actually was asleep, the sudden lack of concentration irritating her. But in the back of her mind, memories of Nibelheim drifted about, making her recall emotions she had felt as well. As the thoughts became stronger, her stomach seemed to become just that more empty. She longed for home, but the true Nibelheim was gone forever, just like her childhood, and her parents. The only thing left now...  
  
'I'll go see Cloud.' She decided, hoping maybe he too felt as she did about home sometimes, laying awake in bed.  
  
~  
  
There was a light knock on the door, as Cloud looked in it's direction from his bed. He sighed dramatically.  
  
"What now..?" He groaned, as Barret in the next bed looked up from under the sheets.  
  
"Jus' quit whining and answer it!" He said, as Cloud got out of his bed in bare feet and his navy blue pants. His tank top however, was thrown on the floor by his armor. As he walked to the door, he turned to Barret and rolled his eyes having that moody expression on his cold but handsome face.  
  
"Quit ordering me around....you're not my boss." He grumbled, opening the door, his eyes widening a bit as his surprise showed to find Tifa waiting there. "Tifa...? What are you doing up so late?"  
  
"Hi Cloud." She smiled, her 'childhood friend' moving to the side to let her enter, which she did quickly, Cloud closing the door behind her. "I just wanted to talk.." She explained, looking to the wooden floor, just as cold in here, as she tried to resist from shivering, the chilly waves running through her body.  
  
"Tifa...it's late." Cloud started, walking past her and sitting down on his bed's side. Tifa invited herself over and sat down beside him, leaning over looking at him. She couldn't help but notice his lack of a shirt, feeling the soft pink that rose in her cheeks. 'He looks so handsome...' Her mind said, as the girl immediatly responded in a deeper shade if red, and looked away from her hero embarrased at her involuntary thought.  
  
"...Is something wrong?" Cloud gazed to her instead now, the bar hostess shifting her arms to cross over her stomach. He raised one of his blonde brows, those Mako blue eyes of his glowing curiously.  
  
"Probably jes' upset you go off telling her it's too damn late to talk." Barret laughed, though he sounded half asleep. "Yet you been here all night sittin' on yo' bed with th' lights on."  
  
"Shut up Barret...." He moaned, Barret's snickering heard from the other side of the room. Tifa smiled some. 'Leave it to Barret to make Cloud mad...' She giggled, Cloud looking to her now confused.  
  
"What's so funny, Tifa?" He asked, a lot more patience in his voice with her than Barret, whom he always snapped at.  
  
"Funny...? Oh...just thinking, Cloud..." She smiled warmly to him, loving to make him wonder and see that look of being puzzled on his face. Though in her heart, she loved everything about him. Everything. Even the sigh that escaped his lips now. Those lips...they looked so cold to her. Fragile...oh, how she wanted to just lean over and...'Stop it, Tifa!' She told herself, looking away from her crush once more.  
  
"Whatever you say...." Cloud agreed, still confused. Between her and Aeris always doing that to him, he wondered what it was with girls, and why they want to talk so awfully late in the night. "What did you want to talk about Tifa..?"  
  
"Cloud..." Tifa started, her expression becoming more serious now. "I couldn't sleep...I was thinking about the old days. Cloud...do you ever...?"  
  
"Think of home...?" He finished the sentence, raising his brow at her yet again. She nodded once in reply, looking at him with her eyes expecting more of an answer. "Yeah....why are you so worried, Tifa?" He tried to understand what it was that bothered her so.  
  
"I just miss the days we were kids...." She explained, talking lowly.  
  
"Me too..." He agreed. Tifa sighed softly, and Cloud was still trying to understand what he could do to comfort her.  
  
"...I'm sorry, Cloud." She spoke, barely a whisper, as though the words choked her. "I made you believe your own confused thoughts....the entire time. But I didn't want lose you Cloud...." Tifa struggled to explain.  
  
"It's okay, Tifa...I know who I am now..." He comforted, looking down as a random spike or two softly fell over his right Mako infused eye. "I couldn't have without you."  
  
"....You were still there." She smiled, two fingers twisting brunette strands around. "We weren't childhood friends Cloud...but you were still there. And every time I saw you, I wondered why you were so quiet.."  
  
"You saw me?" Cloud asked, Tifa's turn to explain.  
  
"Yeah...we never talked much though....I was always with my other friends...and just as you hated them, they didn't like you....but I still saw you."  
  
"I thought you didn't like me..." Cloud sighed, looking down as his eyes narrowed. He always hated her friends, indeed, but as much as she'd laugh and joke when she was young, he was never able to hate her.  
  
"From the few times we did talk, I liked you." Tifa smiled. "But you were distant...and after I fell off the mountain, Dad didn't trust me to be around you."  
  
"I joined SOLDIER to change that..." Cloud retold once more.  
  
"Thinking of Nibelheim...I never guessed we would end up here, so far away and fighting for the Planet. But I'm glad we've gotten closer...I don't regret any of it." She shook her head, as Cloud started to think to himself in deep thought. Silence was cast upon the room. 'But how I love you now, Cloud..' Tifa looked at Cloud..telling him that in her thoughts. 'Ever since the promise I'd fallen for you....and I still love you.'  
  
Cloud's expression became rather upset, as Tifa leaned over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder looking into those orbs of his, her stomach almost melting away despite the icey dangerous glare in them. "Cloud...?"  
  
"Sephiroth will pay for what he's done!" Cloud vowed. "If it wasn't for him, Nibelheim would still be...and my mother.....but I won't let him have the Planet...or you."  
  
"Cloud..." Tifa smiled once more, her hero still keeping his promise. "I know..I have my hero after all."  
  
"I'm not a hero Tifa...." Cloud sighed, his temper calming. "I let Sephiroth summon Meteor...I've already failed everyone...even Aeris..."  
  
"But you tried...and we still got to, and I'll make sure we do." Tifa promised, as she remained calm, understanding, and patient with Cloud. He was going through a lot, and if anyone was going to stay by him until the end, it'd be the one who loved him most.  
  
"Yeah..." He said. "..Tifa....."  
  
"Yes, Cloud?" Tifa asked, as she shifted to sit completly on the bed, still facing Cloud however. Her eyes shined...and her heartbeat picked up just slightly. So many times he'd do this, and she'd hope he'd say why she always dreamed of him saying.  
  
"..We'll defeat Sephiroth, get revenge for Nibelheim and Aeris....and I'll make sure he doesn't hurt you again." Cloud stood up as he finished his sentence, then pulled down the covers on his bed, as Tifa slid over to the edge of the bed then stood as well. "It's getting late now....is there anything else you needed to talk about?"  
  
"Well..." Tifa paused. She apologized about their childhood, and they'd talked about Nibelheim..and vowed to defeat Sephiroth once more. Her mind was in better spirits, but her heart was still locked up with it's feelings. "...No, that's all Cloud." She said, her hopes slowly dying of Cloud ever telling her 'I love you'.  
  
"Okay..." He agreed, scratching his head still confused. " Then..get some rest. I'll see you in the morning."  
  
"Okay, Cloud. Goodnight." Tifa smiled, as she left the room, hearing a click behind her meaning Cloud turned his room's light out. She sighed, walking back into her darkened room, making her way between the beds to her own at the farthest end. Tifa, as quiet as she could, placed her body over the bed and slid under the covers, soft rustling sounds coming from them.  
  
She shifted, turning on her side and making herself slowly fall into slumber. Her mind was becoming a blur, as wishful thoughts drifted through it, and that one question that now bothered her. 'Will he ever know?'  
  
Tifa slowly fell into sleep, dreaming of her hero, wondering if he was dreaming of her. One day, she'll tell him.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
This story won't be continued, and I basically wrote it to reflect on how Tifa's emotions are. Please review though, I'd like to know how you think it came out. I'll be writing some other short stories, too. Thanks ^_^ ~Tifa-Shan 


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